When Painful Things Explode Unto Healing
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Beloved, have you been embroiled in a painful situation lately that has blown up in your face? If so, I want to encourage you.
Here’s the key I believe the Lord wants you to know today:
Sometimes God allows painful things to come to a head in order to bring healing.
Things happen. Life happens. People sin. People sin against God and against other people sometimes.
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And people and their personalities–with all the varying backgrounds and hurts and wounds that influence those personalities–happen too. Hurting people hurt people sometimes.
All of these things are terrible; we should not pretend otherwise. We should never call bad “good” or good “bad.” However, we also shouldn’t think these situations are hopeless.
There is always hope–and sometimes your healing requires God to allow things to come to a head.
God often allows things like this to come to a head and explode–rather than helping you suffer in silence–so He can take care of them.
For example:
When you’re sitting on your bed crying so hard that you can barely breathe because you’re tired of being abused …
And you decide that your spouse is going to have to stop abusing you emotionally and verbally (or any other way) or you’re going to leave them …
And you confront your spouse about their behavior, and tell them you’re thinking about leaving them …
And they’re suddenly inspired to change, and they agree to go get counseling with you, and to your shock they really do change, and together you start down the road to healing.
In this example, the bad situation was not from the Lord.
It’s never God’s will for anyone to abuse you, or for any spouse to mistreat the other spouse–or for any person to mistreat any other person. HOWEVER, I do believe that in the (hypothetical) example I described above, GOD allowed it to come to a head where you couldn’t tolerate the situation anymore–so He could bring healing.
Because sometimes, if a situation is tolerable, you keep on tolerating it.
And we shouldn’t. We shouldn’t tolerate it. Matthew 18 tells us specifically that, when someone hurts us, we should to to them and confront the situation.
But we often don’t do that. It’s easy for us to defend other people when they’re hurting, but it can be hard for us to stick up for ourselves sometimes. Sometimes we just let ourselves hurt …
… And hurt …
… And hurt …
… And hurt.
And that’s not God’s will either.
The fact is that you are created in the image of God, and it is His will for people to treat you kindly and with honor. And while we shouldn’t go around telling people how much they need to honor us, when boundaries are crossed it IS good, right, and appropriate to address it.
If your spouse is cheating on you, you have to address it; don’t pretend it isn’t happening.
If someone is abusing you, say so and stand up for what’s right.
If boundaries are being crossed, confront the person according to Matthew 18 and establish healthy boundaries.
We have to confront these situations gently, in love, and using good and kind people skills … but we still have to confront them.
The fact is that sometimes people don’t change unless you openly confront an issue.
And while I do think issues should be confronted as calmly as possible and in love, you still have to confront the issue when there is one.
Here’s the key: there is always hope for every situation through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Your marriage can heal. Maybe God allowed this thing to come to a head so you can get godly, Biblical help and the hurt can stop. Maybe you and your spouse can even build the marriage of your dreams, now that you’ve both come face-to-face with the fact that things are not okay.
Or …
Your friendships can heal. Maybe God allowed this thing to become so glaringly obvious and unacceptable to you at this time so that He can get everything out in the open and heal and deliver both you AND the person or people who hurt you.
Or …
You and your boss can get along again at work.
Hey, I’ve been there–and I’ve had to confront a toxic boss for the way they treated me. You know what? After that confrontation, things got better. It was hard, and there were months or years of pent-up emotions involved that led to the confrontation, but things got better afterward.
The wrong, the damage, the insults, the abuses are NEVER from the Lord. But …
Sometimes the urge to stand up for yourself in love and establish boundaries now IS from the Lord. And I believe that when the Lord allows it, it’s always to bring healing.
Of course, we do have to walk in love throughout the process:
- We have to forgive.
- We cannot allow bitterness to overtake any part of our souls.
- We have to invite Holy Spirit to pull the hurt out at the very root level …
… But our loving Heavenly Father wants to do that; He wants to pull that hurt out and heal you. Jesus is our Wonderful Counselor for a reason, and He’s very good at what He does when we listen to Him.
Oh beloved, we have to learn to stand up for righteousness and justice. Not to exact vengeance in any way, but to stand up for what’s right.
One of my favorite preachers, Ray Hughes, says, “When you get saved, God will give you a new heart–but you have to grow you a backbone.” Funny, huh? And it’s so true. We have to learn the difference between letting people abuse us and turning the other cheek. We have to learn to stand up for what’s right; to love ourselves the way Jesus wants us to …
… while still forgiving and not walking in offense against those who hurt us.
It’s a very hard balance sometimes. But, the Lord will always help us with it.
Beloved, have you been hurt today?
Is a bad situation in your life exploding all at once and coming to a head? If so, pray this with me:
“Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for being my Father. Thank You for loving me and coming to my rescue over and over again.
Father God, I call upon You today as my Wonderful Counselor. I need You, and I need Your help. I need You to:
- Help me see the situation with Your eyes.
- Help me understand the situation with Your heart.
- Give me wisdom and help me handle the whole thing properly, the way You desire.
- Help me to love the people who have hurt me like You love them.
- Help me to see them the way You see them.
- Help me forgive them, the same way Jesus forgave the people who crucified Him.
- Anoint me to communicate in this situation.
- Make me brave to confront what needs to be confronted.
- Help me to establish wise boundaries and stick with them, the way You want me to.
- Keep me from getting over into the flesh; help me to walk in the Spirit at all times.
Father, I need Your help to navigate these waters.
Please move me through this situation and bring healing, not hurt. Deliver me and all others involved from hurt, hatred, bitterness, unforgiveness, anger, rage, offense, and the spirit of murder. Convict me of my own sin if in any way I have sinned against You. Keep me and all the others from sinning against You any more, and draw us to Yourself.
Father, in Jesus’ name I ask that You would bring everyone involved in this situation to repentance together. Bind us together in a spirit of forgiveness and reconciliation in a healthy way. Make things better than they ever were before, and let it all be for Your glory.
In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Beloved, have you been dealing with a situation that has recently exploded in your face? Did you pray this prayer today? If so, leave a comment below and I will be praying for you.
Hallelujah Amen hallelujah! Glory be to God. Thank you. Thank you really. Thank you Prophetess Jamie. Grace to you and blessing from God our father in heaven. Thank you.
Most very grateful.
Thank you Lord for providing this just when i neede it…thank you Jaimie
I have adult children that truly need to respect and honor me as a mother.
To appreciate me and have a heart of gratitude for all I have done.
That my youngest adult daughter Adriana starts to be a team player and start to really take responsibility to pay every month her part of the rent for her stay in my house! For her to reach out to me and keep our conversations healthy!
I bind the spirit of jealousy and enviousy off of her! Spirit of rebellion and foul attitude and language towards me and her oldest sister!! She needs to pull her weight now !!
We are stronger together as a family!
However there is a spirit of division and strife and enough is enough!!!!
So thank you for this prayer 🙏
I’m believing for complete healing ❤️🩹 for each one and restore our relationship better these kids are adults now!!
Praise the Lord! Crying out to Abba as this prayer is spot on right now! Jamie, thank you for helping me put my thoughts and feelings into words to lift up in prayer yet again. I refer to the sample prayers in your books often. Such great resources!
Thank you . My 25 yr old son was killed sept 6 this year . His birthday is Saturday 20th .
It hurts and I hurt for my children who miss him .
Thanks for this difficult word today. I’m in a tough situation with my marriage and another couple is hurting too. It’s going to come to a head and apparently we’re just going to have to deal with it. I was hoping for change through prayer without confrontation but I don’t think that’s possible. I’m still hoping for it but it’s the 11th hour, 59th minute and nothing has changed. So Lord, open ears to truly hear and help us speak in love.
Thank you once again for knowing exactly what I needed. You are so kind, loving and patient with me help me to be the same with others today. Love you ABBA,
Amen
I’m dealing with a situation at work which is exactly this. Where I am starting to get bitter cause I don’t understand it. I have never confronted it, but I know there has been a nudging for me to confront it. Thank you for this. God bless you for being so sensitive to the Spirit
I am battling with my ex partner he has totally turned my 16 year old son against me he has told my son that I dont love my son and that I hate him, which is not true, my son is 16 he and his brother are so precious to me. My son is also autistic and his father gets involved in illegal activities. I dont know where else to turn or what else to do. I cry to the Lord but I dont know if he hears me. Even my sons grandmother, brother aunts and cousins have been stopped from trying to contact my son. We are heart broken and I worry about what trouble the father will lead my son into. I really don’t know what to do anymore. Wherever I turn theres no help
Praying for you and this situation Andree. God hears your prayers. Please don’t stop calling on him and believing 🙂
Thank you so much for this prayer and inspiring words . I I have forgiven my sons father for all the abuse and controlling behavior. I have to still live with him with my 9 yr ol sc and he has unforgivnessand hate in him . He provokes our son daily . He puts us down daily . I kno I have tried talking to him for 7 yrs and ihe gets defensive and everything is my fault and he just yells . So there is nothing we can do besides trust God and pray . This situation will glorify God with our testimony. Thank you so much
I need prayers for me and my children. I’m fighting a nasty custody battle and I am the parent that really loves them and wants what’s right for them. I pray that this ends now. It’s one of the worst things that has ever happened to me. Please pray for me… thank you
Amen…restoration, forgiveness, and healing.
Jamie God has been using you lately for me! You just don’t know! Thank you my sister in Christ!
Jamie I need prayers for an ungrateful person who is manipulating my family lives and is trying to destroy us with lies and deceifulness. We are hurting.
Hello thank you for the encouraging words. Walking through painful situations takes it’s toll. Every situation brings growth in our lives. God bless
Mrs Jamie I am so grateful for you. You always send me the right encouraging words as a child of God. Please pray for my son that he will restore his life with God and then with me. I was already administrating to him to restore his life. He got saved when he was 15 years old, but he got married and the wife does not want him to talk to me. We would pray together but he stopped. He does not call me. He said it had to do with his wife. This is not the first time it has happened. Just help me pray. I am still going for treatments. God is good. Have a wonderful and blessed day 😊
First and Foremost I thank you as I was reading this prayer help me see it a little better I ask God for something and realize my timing and God timing is different and as I am typing God is speaking….
Thank you, Jamie — God’s timing is always perfect. I painful family situation is coming to a head. I need prayer. so badly to stay strong and trust God. Please pray for me.
Thank you Jamie for this prayer. I have been dealing with a situation that exploded Sunday. I’m at my wits end because we are not communicating and shut off from each other. The verbal and emotional abuse is real and has been for some time. I prayed this prayer because I have hope in the Lord
Thank you so much for this word
This truelly spoke exactly about my situation. Please pray for me for deliverance and that the hand of the enemy will be exposed. That just as this situation exploded without warning so will the it be dealt with.
Thank you Jamie. Please pray for my situation, my mother has left her home to be placed in a nursing home – diagnosed with Dementia. She has been looking after her 63 year old daughter who i believe is taken over my demon powers and has locked herself in her home and wants nothing to do with me or my family. She (Rosa) believes we are bad people, she needs care as she has an intellectual disability and borderline personality disorder. Please please PRAY! Bless you 🙏🏻
Thank you for this prayer & post Jamie, please pray for my marriage. My husband’s name is David. God bless you!
Thank you Jamie for these encouraging words.God bless you.
Hi Jamie. Thanks always for being an encouragement and allowing God to use you to speak to my life. Am so broken because my husband is cheating on me with a colleague. Am hurting and feel like quiting right away. We are both born again but my husband has been flirting with this lady even after we talked about it. Am devastated. I need prayer and counselling.
Hi Maureen, I’m so sorry this is happening. Please find a good, Christian marriage counselor right away and get into marriage counseling every week, with your husband if he will go but go by yourself if he will not!!! Stand up for what’s right, no matter what. Don’t ignore what your husband is doing; don’t back down; insist on faithfulness.
I will pray for you.
Blessings,
Jamie
Hi Jamie,Please pray for me as I have been retrenched since December 2019.There was a manager in the company that caused problems for me.I had gone for an interview in January 2020 but did not get the job as this manager gave me a bad reference.I have been trying to get my job back at the company I worked at with the help of colleagues but it seems this manager filed a negative report about me to our HR department.I cant question him now as he passed away last month due to covid.I loved my job and the work I did.I have even sent an email to another manager there but got no response from him yet.I ask that god intervene on my behalf and reverse this situation and I am able to get my job back.God bless you Jamie🙏
hi Jamie bless you yes i had this last night my sons father was abusive verbally and emotionally but not only to me to our son as well its going on the 2nd day I cannot speak to him we have been down this road for 4 years he blames me for everything he has narcsistic traits i do call on the Lord i just know some people cannot change or unwilling i have my faults but i admitt tjem he is proud woth ego it doesnt always work out been tryingfor years he doesnt value or respect me my son is basically scares of him i dont lile luving lile this i hate it i ask Jesus to help but ive done this so many times and its always me i cant even look at him anymore and my child is hurting to but thank you for this i appreciate you just cant tolerate 14 years of abuse he knows i have no money and no where to go we actually divorced i love Jesus he doesnt i thank you for encouraging us bless you
I am praying with a friend a of mine about the same thing here and it’s giving us a hard time can you help us pray
Please pray for me, I am going through a trying situation at my place of work.
Thx xx
Hello Ms Jamie, daughter of The King. I have this vision that soon I will not just support and agree with you in prayer but to sow as well. I pray God will fill your cup and keep it overflowing because it is His ministry that you are chosen to steward over….that He provide for every need and more that you’ll always have and never run out. God bless you. Your blog has been a blessing for me especially in times such as what I’m going through with my family. God bless you, your family and this ministry entrusted to you 🙂
Jamie please pray with me on this matter; For God to bring complete healing in my heart, to uproot any bitterness and reconcile everyone involved for the glory of His name. Thank you.
Hi Jamie. Thank you so much for this post and this prayer. They both are really speaking to my broken heart and situation right now. I will keep rereading and praying this prayer. Please also pray for me. May God bless, keep, protect and prosper you, in Jesus name. 🙏🏽
Praying for your broken heart. And thank you for your prayers for prosperity.
Jamie
This is so good and right on time! Thank you ❣️
please pray God protect me and my 14 yo son from my husbands brother who was abusive towards him and now wants that my husband has passed is trying to take advantage of me and my son when we are vulnerable. pray i can set and stick to boundaries where he cannot get to us andabuse us or mistreat take advantage of us in Jesus name amen
This is such an on time message! God is So good, He knows exactly what we need.. You are truly being used to speak to me and my marriage. There is so much hurt and i have been waiting on God to deliver me from it so that I can heal. I am praying for all who are involved. Please keep us in prayer. God Bless you Jamie
Im going through a stress my face was swollen.Marriage problem.
Boss which take me out of the office without my concern.