Learn THIS About Boundaries!

Have you ever had someone condemn you for your decisions, but they had no right to do so? If so, let this little example that happened to me encourage you!

Yesterday, I posted something on social media about a very difficult decision I am having to make in order to preserve my 80-year-old mother’s safety in my home.

Well, someone I don’t know, and have never met, felt the need and the right to try and heap shame and condemnation on me for this decision. I pushed back, pointing out that that person doesn’t know me and has zero input into my decision. Their comment was entirely inappropriate.

Some people were understanding, but one person who also doesn’t know me and whom I don’t know felt the need to message me privately to criticize my pushback and calling my action unChristlike.

I’m going to address this publicly so hopefully we can all learn something here:

Rather than being unChristlike, my actions were extremely ChristLIKE—just not in a way that is palatable to many people. 📢📢📢📢📢

You see, Jesus had boundaries, but many people in modern times don’t—and they get offended when other people DO. 😢

If you read John chapter 8, you will see an extended occasion where Jesus pushed back against attacks from the enemy. In this chapter, the Pharisees tried to heap accusations and condemnation on Jesus’ head. However, Jesus pushed back with facts and truth. He didn’t sugar-coat any of it.

Jesus refused to back down or yield to the Pharisees’ attempts to intimidate Him. Why? Because they were wrong, and they were operating in the spirit of their father the devil. Jesus actually said so, point-blank, in John 8:44!

Well, know this and know it well:

When people who don’t know you, and have no permission to speak into your life, presume to judge you and heap condemnation, accusations, or shame on you, that is not a valid opinion. That is called “enemy attack,” and you should reject it every time.

On the other hand …

When GOD wants to convict you, He will do it Himself first—and if you won’t listen, then He will send someone who:

1. does know you and does have permission to speak into your life, AND
2. has actual Biblical basis for confronting you.

The woman who felt the need to send me a private message actually told me I am a “prideful woman who leans on her flesh” if I don’t listen to her “and confess your sin to God, repent and apologize publicly to her.” Again, that woman doesn’t know me at all.

However, I did take her feedback to the Lord and prayed about it a long time. I asked the Lord to convict me for any sin I may have committed—a prayer I pray daily—because I ALWAYS want to keep a clean heart before the Lord.

But all I keep hearing is Scripture after Scripture about NOT yielding to false accusations and enemy attack.

You need to know this about boundaries:

If you saw someone trying to attack someone you loved—say, a little child—and heap shame and condemnation on them, you would rise up like a roaring bear and defend that innocent one, right? I hope you would.

Well, the Bible says to “Love your neighbor as yourself.” You can’t love your neighbor UNTIL and UNLESS you love yourself. And LOVE, including loving yourself, means you reject lies and enemy attacks of all kinds, including false accusations, lies, shame, condemnation, etc.

Read John chapter 8 if you aren’t sure about this, and watch what JESUS did. He obviously only did what is righteous, but He was VERY blunt about protecting boundaries and pushing back with truth.

Now, the Pharisees didn’t like it when Jesus stuck up for Himself.

Obviously, they wanted Jesus to yield to their lies, attacks, and condemnation, so they could exert demonic power over Him. But Jesus wasn’t playing their game.

And when YOU have boundaries and enforce them, refusing to play someone’s game that the enemy sent them to try to attack you with, there will be people who will get mad at you too. But you know what? Know this:

It’s better to weather the pushback from mad people who want to control you than it is to yield to the devil who is using them.

Some people don’t like it when you have boundaries.

But, have boundaries anyway. And people will accuse you of all manner of things because you have boundaries. Even if you aren’t unkind, they will say you ARE unkind for being blunt. They feel “unkindness” because, to them, the only thing they would interpret as “kindness” is yielding to their opinion.

Nevertheless, you still have to maintain your boundaries—and it is a very CHRISTLIKE thing to do to push back against enemy attack of all kinds, including the attacks of shame and condemnation.

I hope this word about boundaries helps. Please leave a comment below if this speaks to you today!