Beware the Faceted Nature of Hurts and Wounds

As you walk through the inner healing process for all the terrible things you’ve endured in life, it’s important to remember the faceted nature of hurts and wounds.

Here’s how I learned about the faceted nature of hurts and wounds:

Once upon a time, many years ago, I was at a very large worship event at a different city. I had “fled” to this worship event, needing a touch from the Lord.

I had been through hell for a couple of years at that time, and it just never seemed to stop. I was so broken, but I was doing everything I could think of to heal.

For example:

• I had forgiven until I felt like my “forgiver” was worn out!
• I was praying for my enemies daily.
• I had confronted the situation according to the protocol prescribed in Matthew 18.

But, after all these, things, I was still hurting.

As worship began, I asked the Lord to touch me. However, although I tried with all my might to enter into deep worship, I couldn’t. I kept having images and thoughts of all the things that certain people had done to me flashing before my mind instead. It was very distracting.

Of course, I tried to get rid of those thoughts.

I tried to “cast down every imagination and every high and lofty thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God.” As it says in 2 Corinthians 10:4-5:

“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:4-5 NKJV).

But the thoughts just wouldn’t go away. And here I was, surrounded by thousands of people who were lost in worship. I was listening to one of my favorite worship bands sing anointed music, and all I could think about was the horrible trauma I had been through–and all the terrible things people had done to me.

Suddenly, I felt like the Lord was telling me that I needed to forgive.

The problem was that I had already forgiven for everything I could think of! I had forgiven and forgiven and forgiven and forgiven and forgiven some more–and I had done it the right way, too; the way I will teach you in the last article in this series. I couldn’t figure out why I still needed to forgive, because I already had forgiven.

However, the Lord then showed me a mental picture of a diamond.

It wasn’t a beautiful, sparkling diamond, though. It was a black diamond; a dark thing, like someone had painted black paint all over the diamond.

There was no light in it or shining through it; the diamond was completely dark. (This told me He was showing me a mental picture of something that was not good, for “God is light and in Him is no darkness at all” (1 John 1:5b NKJV).

And the Lord showed me that hurts and wounds have facets, just like a diamond has facets.

When a jeweler cuts a diamond, they cut it with many facets. (Look it up if interested: The most common standard for a diamond is 58 facets!) Each facet is another angle or surface on the diamond. And each one helps make the diamond what it is meant to be.

When looking at my situation, the Lord was showing me that my personal situation was like this dark, negative diamond. It had many facets, angles, and surfaces.

He also showed me that, although I had forgiven for almost everything that had happened to me, there was at least one “facet” of the situation that I had not thought of yet. And since I hadn’t thought of this particular “facet” yet, I hadn’t specifically prayed to forgive the people for that aspect of the painful situation.

Since there was a facet, or aspect, of the situation that I hadn’t yet forgiven, the whole situation still had a “hook” in me.

Actually, it was the enemy that still had a “hook” in my heart through that painful situation. And that is NOT a good thing!

Well, as soon as Holy Spirit showed me these things, I began to pray to forgive the people for that one additional facet of the situation that I hadn’t seen before. And you know what? The moment I finished praying to forgive for that additional facet of pain, the pain went away! I suddenly felt lighter than a feather, and I was easily able to enter into worship.

Friend, hurts and wounds have many different facets.

When you pray to forgive (which we are leading up to in this article series!), you have to forgive the people who hurt you for every aspect of the situation. If you leave even one facet of the situation unaddressed, it will continue to hurt and hurt and hurt and hurt you.

Additionally, the enemy will still have his hook in you through that one thing you didn’t forgive for yet. You definitely don’t want that!

Here’s how to identify every facet of any situation:

1. Ask God the Holy Spirit to help you. He is your Helper, Counselor, Comforter, and Guide. Our God is Healer, too! As you listen to Him and forgive, He will walk you through all the things about which you need to pray.
2. Look for both “what they did do” and what they didn’t do (what they failed to do). For example, if someone verbally abused you, “what they did do” is the abuse. “What they didn’t do” is that they didn’t have good words to say; didn’t affirm you or build you up; failed to encourage you or offer you the comfort you deserved as their son or daughter; et cetera.
3. Look for the aftereffects of a situation as well. For example: If someone goes behind your back to do something, then not only did they hide something or do something they shouldn’t have done, but they also betrayed your trust. The betrayal of trust is an aftereffect of something they did that was wrong, but it’s every bit as damaging and hurtful.

When someone hurts and wounds you, the peripheral aftereffects of that event are just as important to forgive as the original sin.

All the domino effects of a painful event will impact you, even if you haven’t sat down to think about those domino effects! And the thing that happened will continue to hurt until you forgive for absolutely every facet of the situation.

Additionally, the enemy will still have his “hook” in you if there is any aspect of the situation that you haven’t forgiven …

… because, if you remember, Jesus told us that we must forgive from our heart whenever someone hurts us, to infinity and beyond! 🙂 (See Matthew 18:21-35.)

However, there’s good news! And that is …

When you have forgiven completely, the way the Bible prescribes that forgiveness should be done (which is VERY different from how most people genuinely think that forgiveness is done), the pain typically leaves.

I’ve seen it over and over again, both in myself and in people to whom I’ve ministered all over the world: when we pray through to forgive all hurts and wounds completely, the pain leaves. Suddenly, you feel like the hurt or offense, no matter how dreadful or painful it was, happened to somebody else completely. People typically report that they feel lighter than air; more calm; and more peaceful.

And it’s at that point that you can walk and live as the whole, healthy, stable person that God intended for you to be. 🙂

Beloved, you don’t have to hurt anymore.

Keep on reading this article series for the next keys you need to know about inner healing. At the end of the series will be a sample prayer you can use to pray through and forgive. But, there are a few more keys to learn first. 🙂

Did this key help you understand the hurts and wounds you may be experiencing in your own life a little better? If so, leave a comment below!