I used to feel envious of other people a lot, but I didn’t recognize envy for what it was.
Then one day I watched a bunch of little kids preach at a youth conference. Instead of being happy for them, I got upset with God. (#Facepalm) I wanted to preach; why couldn’t that be me? At that point, I recognized this ugly sin of envy in my life.
I took it to the Lord and read a book on the subject. (The book is Envy: The Enemy Within: Overcoming the Hidden Emotion That Holds God’s Plans Hostage by Bob Sorge [affiliate link].) This book is awesome and really helped me.
In this book, Bob Sorge says that envy–“the biggest sin nobody has”–is when we despise the gifts and the call the Holy Spirit has given to us, and lust after someone else’s instead.
Basically, if I envy someone else’s gift, that essentially means I don’t value the gifts the Holy Spirit gave to me. I don’t respect the Holy Spirit as being wise enough to know what’s best for me and when. Instead, I only want someone else’s calling and opportunity.
Just writing this brings tears to my eyes. [Read more…]